No matter whether you are negotiating a pay rise, holidays or with a seller or buyer, there are certain rules or principles that will help you succeed.

• Focus on interests, and not your positions. Positions are fixed, but each of you may have interests which need to be met. Fixed items can put your negotiations into a corner.
• Regardless of what you want, the other person must be satisfied or at least feel satisfied with what they got. It’s important to focus on how you both can win.
• Separate the people from the problem. Focus on solving problems and not on emotions wrapped around the problem.
• Keep your emotions in check. Unless you can get beyond your emotions, a dispute is not likely to be resolved. Feeling that you are right can be a heady emotion, but it has no place in the negotiation. If the other side is only interested in being right, chances are the situation won’t be resolved.
• Know the negotiation style of the person you are negotiating with, listen and question them, you may discover a better deal than you ever thought was possible.
• Look forward, not back. If one party gets too involved in what has happened in the past, it can be counter-productive. You have to work out a way to get to the present and deal with current issues. Ask the other party what they want now to resolve the dispute
• Always Have a Plan B. Ask yourself questions that start with how or what if? How can I sweeten the deal? How can I close the deal? What if the other party likes this? What if they reject this? Try to come up with some alternatives that will help seal the deal. Having a Plan B gets easier the more you negotiate. It becomes a way to be flexible and react to what the other side wants and think fast on your feet.
• Be prepared and do your research. That could be as simple as listing your arguments on a sheet of paper or as complex as doing the research to cost out a request for wage increases. Either way, you need to be prepared. Otherwise, you might make a concession or agreement that you will later regret. You need to know the rationale behind your requests and a good estimate of the costs, including the future costs. You cannot be over-prepared. It is important to have as much information and research as possible just in case you need it.